DN! has a piece up today on a documentary entitled “Dear White People…”
We need the conversation to begin, so I’m glad that they are taking it on…but as I viewed the excerpts, I started to get that feeling of dread. Because a young African American woman states that we (black folks) are all different and another clip one states that because she is the person of color in the room, suddenly she becomes the “voice” of the African American community. But it seems lost on the black community that perhaps whites feel the same way? We don’t all think alike and because one treats you badly or is prejudiced does not mean that we all agree with that person’s actions. Most white folks have good hearts but don’t realize some of the stuff that is said and done is hurtful (as the producer of the documentary states.)
During the interview with “Reggie” –he talks about his personal life and how he lived on an all-black floor in college. He said it helped to be with his “people’ after having people touch his hair and professors say “stuff” to him….my thought was: doesn’t he think some white people could understand that? Again, it is a block put up to sharing a common bond. White people whom have been bullied, put down, ostracized can all understand how being singled out feels. They may not understand how it is to be black, but they can understand pain.
And the tipping thing? Hello! Women are also stereotyped for being bad tippers. A long time ago, when I had a life, I sat in a restaurant and waited while the white waitresses were gossiping for twenty minutes until one finally came over to take my order. And it was cold when she brought it out. And yeah, I left a penny tip. Screw that.
In other instances, I would leave 15% tips when the going rate was 10%. Sometimes the service warranted that, but most times it was just okay, but I left the bigger tip because of the prejudice against women.
As far as his admission that black folk use their blackness as a tool sometimes to navigate the world…but it creates barriers. As I experienced in Ft. Wayne, an African American guy had created a serious problem for the entire building that could have meant injury or death for the residents. When one of the white fire fighters said something to him because he was yelling at them to shut the alarm off (they could not do that–it was a door alarm and they had the door open to let all the smoke out)** edited, he immediately blamed it on racism. He went on and on about it instead of taking a step back and realizing HE was the problem, not his skin color. And this is not a condemnation of the guy–he wasn’t a bad person, but had a screwed up view of the world.
It’s funny that this came up today, because when I was getting dressed this morning, I thought about seeing the Light in others.
Buddhists popped into my head –the Buddhists don’t believe in a God as one Supreme Being, but that God resides in each of us. Their greeting “Namaste” means that they recognize God within you and within themselves.
Even if one doesn’t believe in the Buddhist religion, if we could stop looking at each other’s skin color…or anything physical…and recognize the Light within the other, we could move past the prejudice. Our hearts involved in decision making instead of just our heads…
**edited for link to DN and further explanation above.
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